Are you feeling stressed?

Stress isn't always a bad thing. It can make your body produce adrenaline, the 'fight or flight' hormone which gives you that little extra bit of drive to overcome nerves and do really well in a situation.

But long term, stress can be bad news.

If you are dealing with long-term stress, whether it is bullying or some kind of family problem, your body will react physically to the pressure of having high levels of stress-related hormones in your system.

Find out more about how our bodies react under pressure in our feature what is stress?

If you are worried you may be getting stressed, or worried about a friend, watch out for warning signs like these:

• irritability
• difficulties sleeping
• going off your food
• becoming quiet and withdrawn
• feeling tired all the time
• stomach aches or headaches
• finding it hard to concentrate on school work
• having difficulty solving problems you usually find easy.

 

Young People Coping with Stress

It may feel like there is nothing you can do when you are feeling stressed to make yourself feel better. But there is.

Here are a few tips from some experts. Give them a try.

Beating Stress

Think of your stress as a puzzle to be solved. Work out what situations make you feel stressed (exams, going to a party, meeting a new person) and how you behave.
Think of different ways you could behave in that situation, so you would feel more in control.
Imagine how other people might behave if you acted differently. If you seem nervous, for example, they might get nervous too; if you smile, they will probably smile back.
Try rehearsing different ways of behaving - act it out loud with a friend.
You might get it wrong when you try it for real, but not everyone is right first time. Try it again, next time.
If things are getting on top of you, try to find someone to talk to. It might be your parents, an Aunt or Uncle, a close friend, a teacher or the school nurse. If you go to church, temple, or another place of worship, you could speak to someone there.
If you are having difficulty sleeping or feel tearful and depressed, you could see your family doctor or practice nurse. They can put you in touch with specialists who are trained to deal with young people's problems.

Exam Stress

Try to plan your revision time by drawing up a timetable. Build in time for the things you enjoy - like watching your favourite TV programme, going out with your friends, or going to play football in the park.
Don't leave your revision to the last minute - cramming will only make you more stressed out.
Work out the best time for you to revise - some people are more alert in the morning; others study better later in the day.
Study in short bursts, rather than long sessions.
Give yourself a few treats - pamper yourself with a long hot bath, or listen to your favourite CD for an hour after you have finished your revision.
There are more tips about managing stress during revision and exams in our coping with exams feature.

 

Family Relationships

Try to talk to your parents about how you feel. Don't let them pass the buck to you about choosing which of them you want to live with.
Talk to as many people as possible about what is going on, especially your friends. Don't bottle it up.

 

Abusive Situations

If you are being bullied or abused physically or sexually, try to tell an adult - such as your parents or a teacher you trust.
You may decide to tell a friend at first. If you do that, you should still try to work out how you are going to tell an adult.
If you really don't feel able to tell anyone yet, then keep a diary. You might find it a therapeutic way of expressing how you feel. It will also be useful as a record should you ever take the matter further.

 

Life Experiences - We've Been There

Leigh, 16, has just decided to leave sixth form college because he found the work difficult.

'The biggest stress for me was getting a lot of course work all at the same time, with the deadlines close together. I've decided to get a job and do the courses in computing part-time at my own pace.'

Leigh, who lives with his mum and grandparents, finds studying hard. 'You go downstairs and they have got the telly on really loud. You can't get much peace and quiet, especially when you are trying to study.'

He's a firm believer in telling someone if you are stressed out by something. 'Go and see the teachers if you've got problems,' he says. 'I know everyone says it, but not many people do it. I did it once when I didn't understand something and ever since I always talk to them.'

Michelle, also 16, has just started sixth form college after doing well in her GCSEs.

'I got really stressed out waiting for my results. It was quite scary on the morning, having to wait for them to be posted up at the school. I couldn't eat any breakfast, although I did at least sleep the night before. I was quite frightened about starting a new school. I found it difficult to start making conversation, but you just had to work at it. It's weird at the moment. The courses are not what I expected. It was so easy at school but now it is so much harder. I've got assignments to do and I panic, especially when I don't understand what I am supposed to do. But once when that happened, I asked the teacher, who helped to explain it to me. Then I was alright.'

David, 9, feels a bit stressed when he goes to the doctor's.

'I just get a bit worried when I'm sitting in the chair in the waiting room. But I just go ahead with it and get it over with.' His friend Harry does have problems though. 'Sometimes people are horrible to him and he really freaks out and starts punching them. He doesn't do it on purpose. Afterwards, he just can't believe what he has done.'

Sarah, 16, has had problems at home recently.

'I had a bit of trouble with my dad. He was moaning at me because he said I wasn't doing enough around the house. He went really mad, threatening the house wasn't big enough for both of us. I was really upset, but decided I had to talk to him more and tell him what was going on in my life. I used to just talk to my mum and I think he felt left out.'

 

Help and Info

A WAY OUT is not responsible for the content of third party sites.

If you need someone to talk to about stress, including bullying, problems with parents or exam worries, there are several organisations and helplines (See where to get advice page). Or you can come to one of our drop-ins (see service timetable) or message us through facebook.